My pure love for hotel stationery
COUNTLESS
must be the number of meetings
I have attended in my career
spanning over decades.
At the end of every meeting,
it has been my practice
to invariably remove the pencil
or ballpoint pen placed before
my nameplate on conference tables
and put it into my pocket.
I did not
— and do not —
feel guilty about it
because
I know that it is meant for me.
I have my collection of
Parkers and Sheaffers,
Crosses and Watermans,
DuPonts and Mont Blanc Meisterstucks,
oodles of them,
but
when I see a pencil or a pen,
I must have it.
I do not know if you will brand me a kleptomaniac,
but I confess:
one thing that I cannot stop myself
from is acquiring pencils and pens.
I am not smitten by the pangs of conscience
after checking out of a hotel room
when I recall that
I could not resist the temptation to
'steal'
the pencil or the pen
they keep next to the scribbling pads
on the bedside table,
the writing table and the toilet.
(Why one in the smallest room,
I have always wondered.
Maybe the brightest of ideas spring forth in the loo,
as good old Archimedes demonstrated
in the third century BC.)
Coming to think of it,
it is not just the pen
and the pencil that catch my fancy.
I like those scribbling pads too.
In the scribbling pad
which doubles as my organiser,
I jot down ideas or thoughts.
I always have a scribbling pad nearby,
to note down phone numbers or messages,
or a list of things to do the next day.
This pad is where I arrange my daily life.
I am not partial to these items:
I love the entire range of hotel stationery
– letterhead and envelopes.
I like to impress my mother
by sending a letter in the thick manila envelope
containing a missive written on the
letterhead of a five star luxury hotel.
How can I forget toiletry
— shampoo and hair conditioner,
moisturiser and talcum powder,
soap and disposable razor.
I do not lay my hands, however,
on napkins, bath towels or bathrobes.
Some hotels pin a notice
on the bathrobe exhorting the guest
to contact the front office if he (or she)
would like to 'buy' the bathrobe.
Ditto in the luxury leather folio
in which the letterhead and envelopes are placed.
Clever guys,
aren't they?
As long as they do not attach such labels
on stationery and toiletries,
my inner voice won't hold me back.
I know some
who are not deterred by such notices.
I have seen huge white towels bearing
the logo of the iconic
Taj Mahal Hotel in Mumbai
put out to dry on the clothesline of a neighbour.
A pal of mine could arguably claim the
dubious distinction of having filched
at an altitude of 3,000 metres
and a speed of 800 kmph.
He is a frequent flyer and has
memorabilia from the Lufthansa,
Cathay Pacific and Quantas.
Whenever another friend
of mine used to dine in a restaurant,
a fine piece of cutlery would slide into his socks.
Exquisite pieces from the
Waldorf Astoria, Raffles and Mandarin Oriental
– you name it, he has it.
When I met him last,
I enquired how big
his collection had grown to.
He said he does not do it any more,
after he was told by a steward that the bearer
has to meet the cost of the cutlery
that the guests help themselves to.
As I conclude this piece
using the stub of a pencil,
I make a mental note to pick up
a pencil from the hotel
during my next visit to Mumbai.
Hinduism is more a way of life than a method of worship.
Dharmo Rakshati Rakshithaha
If you protect Dharma, Dharma will in turn protect you.
Hindus, If people slap you once, slap them twice!
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